Anxiety

Recently a lot of thoughts had been on my mind. I always try to put these thoughts away, but I can't seem to do it. Perhaps the heat of the past few weeks has been playing games with my mind, and I just can't make myself think straight.

I think that I have some anxiety problems; I never really talk about it, because I never really grasped the idea. But I do have difficulties being around large groups of people whom I don’t know, Or even being around a new person at work
When I encounter a new person at work that I've never really talked to, and feel that the person never even tries to make a conversation, makes me feel quite anxious just because I tend to make up stories in my mind, stories that are actually reasons for why that person isn't approaching me first.

I've always led a complicated life, the complication was inside my mind and not visible to the outside world.
I have struggled with this situation for years, and I'm still struggling.

It's also hard for me going to shop alone or eating out at some restaurant, I'm always way too conscious of myself, and my mind starts this endless loop of how people perceive me at the moment, what I'm doing, am I making noise, am I bothering others. I don't know what is my problem, whether it's anxiety or some other psychological term. I just try to keep dealing with it. The huge downside in this situation is that it's really hard to maintain friendships. I have a one really good friend; she kept me going when I felt like falling apart.

Recently, I've met this guy friend who has been like a rock to me, I felt like I could tell him anything that is on my mind, sometimes it felt like he has known me for years, and on other days he just bothered me with his misconception of me. 
Going back through the memory lane of the past year, it feels like he was one of the few people in my life that I've maintained a constant relationship with.
I guess I kept it going because he was just so nice, he was nice and didn't ask anything in return, it was new to me. 
People that I've met never really been nice to me, just because. I guess the main reason for that is that people may think I'm some snob or a really shy person or whatever because that's how I seem, I'm a quiet person, and it's hard for me to approach a person, even a person I might know for a long time. But with him, it was so easy and I felt myself. 
So you can grasp right now the idea that my mind has been analyzing everything, I can't even keep track with it.

I rarely meet people with whom I feel that I can be myself with. I guess that since childhood it was hard for me to get friends, the friends I had made, kind of abandoned me as years passed by, they have made other friends who were more appealing than me, and I was forgotten, just like that. You never know or think how big of a scar it leaves on a person. I guess those scars had stuck with me, and even though I think it didn't affect me, it might have affected me big time, and only now I'm figuring out the consequences.