candleburn

Photo by  Kinga Cichewicz  on  Unsplash Freud said that disregarding our desires and instincts can make us saturated with our own agony and guilt. The more we suppress what we want, the more we become aggressive. The bomb is ticking — we’ll soon explode, and let our agony flow freely, like when a balloon full of air blast and all its air freely abandons the premises of its past captivator. One of my main concerns is being labeled and defined by the society we live in, or perhaps I live in. I’ve written about my  fear of being labeled , but I hate being labeled as much as I fear it. My story begins when I was merely 6 years old. That’s when my parents decided to immigrate to another country so that I could have a better future. At that time, my parents were younger than I’m today. This fact made me contemplate — would have I acted the same? would have I been able to make such a choice? I’d never forgotten my first day in our new country, everything was brand-new to me.

I remember how fear had a hard grip on my life. I like to think about it in the past tense as if I could get over that fear or as if had gotten over it already. Never actually ever managing to really stop feeling fear or being fearful. I recall traveling to London for the first time, Most people thought that I must have been thrilled or in awe, but all I could feel is fear. It was a distant feeling, but I still could feel its presence. On my third day in London, I was walking and appreciating the local street shops, and talking to my friends about most random subjects. The first time I felt real fear was when I have entered a candy shop. I was overly joyous. It was late, perhaps after 6 PM. The shop was located on one of the busiest streets near the Camden market and there were many other open shops around. The street was bustling with crowds that were intrigued by the local goods as presented on the shops’ window display. As I entered the shop, I made sure