I Recall - new poem

Groaning looking at the view that is
In front of me,
There's this feeling like something is missing,
There are memories that I may have repressed,
As I look at the sun rising, the beautiful dawn,
I'm standing mesmerized; I know the pain is gone,
Because now I remembered again what was lost

I recall the squeaking swings, the long slides,
I recall the fall, the yellowish leaves on the ground,
I recall the snow, watery and cold,
I recall the smells, the pace on the road,

The memories I repressed were long lost,
The urge to grow is the only thing that has left,
When have I lost the kid that was inside?
While I was getting my insights of life,
Exploring every move, every sign,
I was lost in my own made cross road,
I chose the trail that was wrong at that time,
Now I regret the decision I've made,
I needed to try and put myself on hold,
Just a bit more there was still time to get to the
Lighthouse, but out of fear I ran

And never looked back.